Little bit more thinking

I have done very little over the weekend other than house work and spending a few hours doing some gardening today. I gave the grass it's first cut, weeded and acquired some more plants. I could do with doing loads in the garden but my money is being diverted to other things at the moment as you can probably tell from the previous posts. I wouldn't be spending all that much time in the garden now the autumn weather is on its way, so may wait until next year before finishing it.

What recent events have shown me more than ever is that I have to do things now, you never know what life is going to throw at you next. I have spent most of my life putting off things and saying I will do this, that and the other and never doing any of it. I am gradually changing, watching things happen to friends and family and realising that it could all too easily happen to me, is making me rush to do as many things as possible NOW. I can't wait for tomorrow, for all I know it may never arrive.

I wrote the other day that it was a new beginning, thats what I was thinking about. My dad's sight is getting worse and he has asked me to come and help him with a few things recently. I have friends who's family have been ill and was thinking about a few people from my year at school who are now no longer with us. I am writing about negative stuff again, but in a good way because it's really pushing me to enjoy my life. No matter what has been thrown at me recently, there have been people there who have been there for me, family of course but also friends who I haven't really known all that long as well as some who have been there my entire life. I am grateful to all of them. I had some very difficult moments, no one quite knows how difficult, but I am stronger for them (strangely Christina Aguilera - Fighter has just come on).

"What doesn't kill us makes us stronger" Friedrich Wilhelm

I would like to close a chapter in my life and start a new one, there are still some lose ends to tie up. I know at the end of this year, I am going to look back and see it has been the most difficult and life altering of the last 27 so far. I would like to make the next 3 months some of the best, after the last 2/3 months being some of the worst. It will start off with the Great North Run on the 1st of October, if that ain't life altering like my parachute jump a year ago, I dunno what is. One thing I really want to do more of is walking, I have missed not going off the last few weeks. I haven't dared in case my knee gives out, which would be a nightmare so close to the 1st. My walks will start again after the G.N.R.

I am hoping to take Wednesday afternoon off to go for a long run, the last long run before the big day. I am working next weekend so wont get the chance. The advice is to ease back the week before, not that I have ever been exactly pushing myself.