Thinking out loud

This week seams to be taking a long time to get through. I guess when you are bored it drags.

I seam to be staring into space a lot this week in a world of my own at work. I have a lot to think about, but dont seam to have much time at home to do any thinking. As always when i go to bed my mind works overtime, so have been very tired.

Today got better at work as it went on. I had supervision and have some work sorted out to do. Its not exactly thrilling but at least some of it is out of the office. i seam to of been chained to the desk the last 2 months.

I spent half an hour talking after supervision suprised nobody mentioned anything when i went back to my desk. Think they would know my response and it wouldnt be polite.

Suppose i have nothing to really complain about. I have a job it pays the bills just wish it was more exciting but nothing can really be done. There is just nothing currently we have that is interesting no matter how hard Jonathan (my line manager) tries to find something. Think he is fighting a losing battle at the minute.

ultimately i know i have to leave if i want to progress. There is just too much other stuff to sort out in my life 1st. still cant decide if i should have a complete career change, my last few jobs have turned me off computers at work. After the 1st few months there is just no challenge and not a lot of new things to learn. I used to love the feeling where you get up and look forward to going to work. Had that the 1st few months in this job and when i was at the red cross.

Keep thinking i would love to be a countryside ranger or something like that but i do love working on computers especially at home. If i could think of a way of combining them, then maybe that would be the perfect job?

The above probably sounds like me complaining yet again but not this time. I am just thinking out loud i guess. Cant write everything down the speed my brain jumps about there is no way a could type and keep up.

The biggest challenges are in my personal life. I have been honest and said how i feel. that was the major thing i decided when in Scotland had to say how i felt or would regret it for the rest of my life.

Another song comes to mind. The long and winding road. Think i am at the beginning of it but at least i have started out now.

i wont go into anymore of my personal stuff at the moment, they are gonna stay personal for now!